The Old Guy: On being hacked and the frustration of technology

And so, the saga begins. I’m in the middle of a very important email exchange with my editors Gail and Tom and BANG!!! that annoying pop up appears, the one that tells me that, no matter which way I go, the mail stops here! No amount of flim-flamming or shilly-shallying is going to get my emails to their appointed rounds. The internet has failed me once again.

We track down the source of the problem as our local cable provider. They tell us that they’re working on it (of course, they are!) and they’ll call us when they’ve fixed it (of course they will!). This is equivalent to saying that the check is in the mail (of course it is!). We’re New Yorkers. We don’t believe anybody about anything unless we hear it on Facebook.

And then, it begins. The sudden rash of unexpected robocalls.

The first one is from Apple Support, with its actual phone number attached. If you read “Apple Support Makes Me Sick” (https://www.silive.com/entertainment/2018/10/staten_islands_old_guy_apple_s.html), then you KNOW that I did not pick up the phone for that one.

Then, there were a couple of 800 and 347 calls, all promising dire consequences if I didn’t contact them immediately.

Luckily for them, I did NOT contact them immediately. Otherwise some lousy hacker would have gotten an earful from me and been told in precise detail where she or he could stick their “emergency”.

I’m making light of it, but these robocalls have become a national hazard. The callers use real phone numbers, everything from the IRS (who, by the way NEVER make phone calls) to the FBI to your cousin Wila who needs you to send her $5,000 immediately.

Another friend complained on line about a flood of robocalls at the same time. So, here’s what you can do to prevent them:

(1) Joan had a service called “Nomorobo” added to our landline. It stops a great deal of the calls from getting past the first ring. You add numbers to the list as they come up.

(2) You can register your phone number on a Do Not Call list by calling 1-888-382-1222. You have to call from the phone you want to register. You can also add your wireless phone at donotcall.gov

(3) I don’t know why we all still have landlines. They’re great when the internet takes a snooze, but they are the main targets for robocallers. Think about getting rid of yours if these calls are all you ever get on your land line.

(4) Never, never, never answer your phone with “Yes”. Your recorded voice can be used to open your bank account. Also, never pick up the phone for blocked or unknown numbers. Answering a robot call proves the number is valid and you will be targeted not only by the original caller but by anybody they sell your number to.

(5) If you get a suspicious phone call or an email from a company whose services you use, do not respond. Call the company directly. I got a fabulous mock-up email from my credit card company telling me to contact it immediately to update my information. I did. I called the number on the back of my card and they assured me they never sent out that email. I sent them the fake email and they got on it.

(6) My credit card has been hacked several times. Whenever I use a machine such as an ATM or the one at my gas pump, after my transaction, I hit the “CLEAR” button several times. I also have one of those thin black envelopes you can buy that block your card from being scanned by a hacker.

Why do I bring this up in my column? Because, unfortunately, the majority of the people being hacked by these vultures are elder people, people who stand the most to lose financially when they are hacked.

The assumption is, because we’re elder, we have limited understanding or experience with electronic devices and are unwise to the many ways that people will try to extort you. Hackers prey upon elder fear of losing everything, being arrested or thrown into jail, owing money to the IRS or their relatives falling on hard times.

What did I tell you in the second paragraph? (I’ll wait.) That’s right…we’re New Yorkers. We don’t fall for anything. We may not be tech natives, but we all know somebody who is. Maybe it’s one of our students, or a friend of our grandchild, or that nice young man who lives next door who’s always asking if we need help carrying up our groceries. Ask them. Sit down and let them explain it to you. And then, practice. Or take a class. You won’t be the only elder there, I assure you. All of the younger people I have met in classes have been kind, respectful and very helpful.

Arm yourself, because it’s a desperate world out there and some people will stop at nothing to make a dishonest dollar. They are doing it to survive. But, you need to learn some survival skills, too. There’s nothing wrong with assuming that some people are out there waiting to screw you over, because, there are.

And once you’ve got a solid footing, once you’ve installed that anti-robocall app, you can do what Joan and I do every time our phone rings once and stops with a defeated sigh.

We laugh our butts off and shout “HAH!”

Hold those grey heads up!

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